Sex has been a challenge for my partner and me lately. Molly* has been experiencing pelvic pain, which makes sex uncomfortable at best, and really unpleasant at worst. Molly’s pain has a few different causes. She has endometriosis, which can be really excruciating. In the two decades we’ve been together, she’s had four surgeries for […]

Yesterday, Jezebel posted an article about a woman whose post on Fetlife (a social networking site for the BDSM world) about an experience of sexual assault resulted in the usual slut-shaming and victim-blaming. It’s worth checking out, and if you’re on Fetlife, take a look at the original post. The Jez piece ends: Dayna’s experience […]

I’ve been following a lot of the conversations in various circles about creeps, both online and in various communities I move through, and I’m really glad that this topic is getting more traction. I know that it’s a tough thing to bring up, for a variety of reasons, but until something gets brought into the […]

Every so often, I see an article or hear someone who says that polyamory is an alternative to cheating. In my opinion, that’s mixing apples and oranges. Polyamory isn’t an alternative to cheating, it’s an alternative to monogamy. So are swinging, having a triad, polyfidelity, open relationships, a single person having multiple partners, and other […]

I’ve been studying, talking about, and teaching workshops about shame for several years and one of the issues that comes up over and over is whether shame is always bad or not. I’ve been looking for ways to talk about this, since I think that shame does serve some purposes and can help us grow […]

There are lots of different kinds of privilege in the world and despite how people often think about them, many of them are not guaranteed to last a lifetime. People with money can fall on hard times, anyone can become disabled, and social status can disappear with the shifting winds of popularity and politics. This […]

There’s some new research about women’s experiences of receiving anal play, and it’s worth taking a look at. About 2000 heterosexual women who experienced anal intercourse at least twice in the previous year were asked about the level and frequency of pain. Almost half (48.8%) had to discontinue the experience because of pain or discomfort, […]