It seems that people who engage in mindfulness practices like meditation or yoga have better sex. According to a recent article in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, sexually unsatisfied women who meditated and did yoga reported increases in arousal and desire. Although this is very preliminary research, it seems that these practices help you learn to stay present and focused on what you’re experiencing, rather than having your attention wander.
This reminds me of the sexological concepts of “spectatoring” and “sensate focus.” Spectatoring is when you get so focused on imagining how you look or how you’re performing that you increase your anxiety and stop enjoying the sex you’re having. That sounds pretty distracted to me and mindfulness skills would certainly help with that. Sensate focus is when you simply pay attention to what you’re feeling, rather than imagining what will happen next, or getting caught up in a fantasy, or stressing about where you put the condoms. Sensate focus has been known to improve sexual experiences for years. So it makes sense to me that meditation and other mindfulness practices would increase your sexual pleasure- there’s already some supporting evidence of that.
In this time of New Year’s resolutions, you might be trying to decide if you’ll really follow through on taking those yoga classes. Now you have an extra incentive- it might make your sex feel better. And even if you don’t learn to keep focused, a little extra flexibility has its own rewards in bed, doesn’t it?