Here’s a question I recently got: There are lots of things people do in bed that seem really aversive and painful to me. BDSM, anal sex, anal beads, fisting, etc. that, at the very least (to my vanilla background) seem like they should be aversive, scary, painful, etc. yet are preferred sexual behaviors by many. […]

There’s an old saying that “luck favors the prepared.” It means that if you want to be ready to take advantage of the opportunities of that random chance offers, it helps to have things set up in advance. That kept coming to mind when I read The Ultimate Guide to Sex After Fifty: How to […]

What would it be like to collect the wisdom of some of the best-known sex and relationship educators in one volume? That’s what Carl Frankel set out to do with Secrets of the Sex Masters. The book takes a different approach than many other guides. Each chapter was either written by someone known for their […]

Talking about sex all day sometimes makes it difficult for me to read erotica. I know plenty of sexuality professionals who love reading steamy stories for fun, but I find that it takes something special to grab my attention. Sweet and Rough by Sinclair Sexsmith is exactly that. First off, can I just say how […]

Earlier this week, I was a guest speaker for a class at Stanford University. My talk on sex-positivity was a lot of fun and the students were awesome. And at the end of it, I was asked what students can do to bring a sex-positive lens to their academic studies. It’s been a long time […]

It’s been really excited to see the progress of California Senate Bill 967. If it gets signed, it will require all universities that receive financial aid to use a standard of “affirmative consent” in disciplinary hearings about sexual assault. In a nutshell, it shifts things from “did anyone say no?” to “did everyone say yes?” […]

One of the most disheartening shifts I’ve seen in the political battles around sex work is the growing trend for various jurisdictions to shift towards a version of the Nordic Model, in which buying sexual services is illegal. While it’s a minor improvement over arresting sex workers, it’s an incredibly flawed and overly simplistic approach. […]